The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

Finally a movie worth watching but mildly hard to follow. I have now viewed this movie twice and understand slightly more then my previous viewing, but theres still some gray areas yet to be explored.
This was Heath Ledgers final movie before his death and Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Collin Farrell take over his role for the parts that hadn't been filmed, which they did in a very tasteful way. Every time Tony goes into the mirror, he becomes one of the different actors so it doesn't leave you saying "now that was obviously done because they had no choice."
This is a story basically of a monk and the devil and getting people to make the decision of right- or easy. Now don't you fret this isn't a religious back hand of making you realize the greater good and why don't we live a more righteous life, no no no. This is essentially a man, a monk, Dr. Parnassus, who got tricked into a never ending game with the devil. Originally to prove that there was good in the world and later into other things.
There is a circus sideshow type of traveling gypsies who get people to go through a mirror and are faced with challenges and literally have to chose the easy way (the devil) or the right way (Dr. Parnassus) and the results of these choices decide the fate of their bets. Dr. P's first win granted him immortality, he states "he gave me this one" he wanted him to win, then becomes a battle royale for anything and everything, at one point he wagers to be young and mortal again so he can be with the love of his life, unfortunately you discover if he has a child (which he does, a daughter, Valentina) that upon her 16'th birthday the devil owns her. They then wager that the first to 5 (in the mirror) decides the fate of Valentina, if Dr. P wins, she is free.
Tony gets thrown in along the way when they find him dangling under a bridge seemingly dead by noose. After rescuing him you discover he did live via a flute down his throat so he could continue to breath. He helps the gang of gypsies to try and get to 5 first, but why you ask does this stranger do so? Well other then they saved his life, he wants to get into the pants of Valentina.
They Win 4, then some Russian mobsters notice Tony and follow him in the mirror and inevitably give 4 to the devil. Now it's left on the fate of 1 and Tony Drags Valentina into the mirror, he promptly shags her then when she says "we should get married and have babies" he begins to distance himself and goes off into HIS fantasy world. I feel it's perfect they used Collin Farrell for THIS version of Tony because he himself is a piece of shit. They go to a Fundraiser for the children with fictional dignitaries and parade their cause to find out that Tony isn't the man he was cracked up to be. He was laundering money through the company and doing nothing for the children, in fact i think he was hurting them.
Then the chase begins to get Tony to make his choice. Dr. P tricks him with several flute options at the top of a staircase with a noose at the top to (rightfully) kill him and set Valentina free. Unfortunately we've lost Valentina along the way, now Dr. P is mindlessly trying to find her and later many many years down the road you discover she's gotten married to Anton (one of the gypsies) and they had a daughter and lived happily ever after.
Oh and Verne Troyer is in this.
Highly fantastical, and and amazing graphics, most the movie is done with a green screen and cg effects but it is visually stunning. Recommend watching but with a clear head and prepared for odd. If your in a sad mood and you want a feel good flick, do not turn to this, but for all other intensive purposes go out and watch your little hearts out.

Did You Hear About the Morgans?

Well what a load of crap this was. Despite Hugh Grant's awkward charm and Sarah Jessica Parker's...uh oh wait she has no good qualities, this movie was crap.
A separated couple goes out to dinner so that Hugh can try and win back his wife (who he cheated on while they couldn't conceive a child) and witness a murder. Thus they are put into the witness protection program and relocated until the murderer is found who is apparently some professional killer working for a mob boss of sorts.
They're sent to Ray, Wyoming which is essentially a ranching town with about 50 citizens occupying it. Everyone in town knows each other and doesn't get dressed with out attaching a gun to some part of their body.
Of course Sarah Jessica Parker calls the adoption agency who wanted to give her a baby and says she is relocated (but doesn't say where) and the adoption must be put on hold, though they've been repeatedly told to not use the phone or internet because they will be found by the murderer, and guess what? Because of this absurdly stupid act they are found.
Just as Hugh and Jessica decide to give it another shot she tells him she slept with someone during their separation, they fight just as the killer finds them and chases them around a rodeo until, yeah you guessed it, he pulls out a gun and everyone in town pulls a gun on him. Theres also some bull riding and horse tricks thrown in there for the cowboy in all our hearts. The murderer is arrested they go back to New York to go back to their normal lives, phew.
Final scene they bring home their adopted Chinese (they always are) baby and discover Sarah is pregnant as well, aww and they all lived happily ever after, and I want to blow my brains out.
I say- give me back 2 hours of my life this movie was a complete cinematic and budget blowing waste.

Devine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood

WOW talk about what I thought would be a feel good movie and epically failed....the feeling of "at least this wasn't my childhood" comes to mind quite frequently.

Lets sum this up short and sweet. Sandra Bullocks character is the daughter of the old women from Requiem for a Dream. It goes through the old woman's life, childhood, motherhood, old lady-hood and how its effected Sandra Bullock as an adult. She apparently is some famous dancer and it starts off with Sandra having an article written about her mom in people magazine that just destroys her as a person. She has 3 best friends who are part of the "Ya Ya Sisterhood" which every time they have to do something for each other or in general they yell YA YA!!! which gets rather annoying. The "Ya Ya's" kidnap Sandra and bring her home (via roofy) to tell her what really happened when she was a kid.
Heres the stories wrapped up in a nutshell, old woman meets love of her life-he joins air force and dies in the war, marries his friend who LOVES her but she's not too fond of, they have 3 kids who she grows to HATE, is an alcoholic, tries to stop being an alcoholic and is told to take drugs, which of course make her INSANE and she beats all of her children while husbands not home, goes to rehab for 6 months and never tells the kids where she went so they assume she ran away for hating them, life continues as normally as possible. Of course Sandra's character holds resentment against mother for well EVER because she thinks her mom despised them so much that she beat them then ran away for 6 months.
Theres also a side story that Sandra Bullock is getting married and she keeps trying to find ways of getting out of it because she thinks she'll turn into her mother.
How's this shindig end? Sandra decides this man is the love of her life and she cant lose him, that her mom was doing the best she could, and mom and dad show some sort of affection towards one another.
My advice...unless you want to kind of feel like crap for an hour and a half, avoid watching this movie. It's a good take on -you don't really know what happened when u were growing up until your an adult- but otherwise just kind of a messy disaster of painful memories.